Osama at APEC?!

This is an interesting bit of news. A team of comedians from the Australian gag show "The Chaser's War on Everything", have managed to cause the first embarrassing APEC security blunder with one of the members dressed as Osama bin Laden managing to ride a fake motorcade through two police cordons into the red zone.

The stunt embarrassed Sydney police who have imposed the tightest security measures in city history for a summit of leaders from Pacific Rim countries, including Bush. Cast members put together a sham motorcade, hiring two motorcycles and three large cars on which they put Canadian flags. Police waved the motorcade through two checkpoints before pulling it over near the Intercontinental Hotel where Bush is staying.

"No particular reason we chose Canada," cast member Chris Taylor was quoted as saying on The Sydney Morning Herald's Web site. "We just thought they'd be a country who the cops wouldn't scrutinize too closely, and who feasibly would only have three cars in their motorcade as opposed to the 20 or so gas guzzlers that Bush has brought with him."

Below is the episode when they aired the said security breach. The Chaser, just brilliant!

Gate$ Dollar$

Money makes the world go round! Sad, but true. Let's be realistic here, we can't live with love alone... In fact, one of the top causes of divorce is money! Anyway, like most of the people in this world, I'm finding ways to earn money. During my search, I came across articles. Articles that I'm not sure whether it can motive me or make me lose hope.

Of course, everybody knows Bill Gates. He's been number one on the "Forbes 400" list from 1993 through to 2006 and number one on Forbes list of "The World's Richest People" from 1995 to 2006 with $57 billion. It was only recently that he lost the title to a Mexican tycoon, but then again, he's been focusing on his foundation for the past years. In 1999, his wealth briefly surpassed $100 billion causing him to be referred to in the media as a "centibillionaire". I can't even reach the 10000 Philippine peso (around $200) mark! I'd like to share a few things I came across my search for money ideas.

Let's start with his company. Microsoft, at one time, announced quarterly revenue of $14.4 billion and net income of $4.93 billion. In other words, Microsoft's daily net income is about $55 million. That's $55 million in pure profit every 24 hours. Do some quick math and you'll learn it takes Microsoft only about...

...10 hours or so to exceed Red Hat's (NYSE: RHT - News) quarterly net income of $20.5 million.
...4 days to exceed Research In Motion's (NasdaqGS: RIMM) quarterly net income of $187.9 million.
...4 days to exceed Starbucks' (NasdaqGS: SBUX) quarterly net income of $205 million.
...1 week to exceed Nike's (NYSE: NKE - News) quarterly net income of $350.8 million.
...2 weeks to exceed McDonalds' (NYSE: MCD - News) quarterly net income of $762 million.
...2 weeks to exceed Apple's (NasdaqGS: AAPL) quarterly net income of $770 million.
...18 days to exceed Google's (NasdaqGS: GOOG) quarterly net income of $1 billion.
...23 days to exceed Coca-Cola's (NYSE: KO - News) quarterly net income of $1.26 billion.
...5 weeks to exceed IBM's (NYSE: IBM - News) quarterly net income of $1.85 billion.
...10 weeks to exceed Wal-Mart's (NYSE: WMT - News) quarterly net income of $3.9 billion.

Amazing, isn't it? Now, let's go to Mr. William Gates III. Most people will have read the reports of how Microsoft Chairman Bill Gates has had his personal net worth soar over 100 billion dollars and then drop down to 55 billion.

Consider that he made this money in the 25 years or so since Microsoft was founded in 1975. If you presume that he has worked 14 hours a day on every business day of the year since then, that means he's been making money at a staggering million dollars per hour, around $300 per second. This means that it is not worth his effort to pick up a $1000 if he dropped one while he was walking. Assuming of course that it takes 4 seconds to pick it up and pocket it.

Another way to examine this sort of wealth is to compare it to yours. Consider an average American of modest wealth. Perhaps she has a net worth of $70,000. Mr. Gates' worth is 800,000 times larger. Which means that if something costs $100,000 to her, to Bill it's as though it costs 12 cents. You can work out the right multiplier for your own net worth.

So for example, you might think a new Lambourghini Diablo would cost $250,000, but in Bill Gates dollars that's 31 cents.

That fully loaded, multimedia active matrix 233 MHZ laptop with the 1024x768 screen you've been drooling after? Half a penny.

A nice home in a rich town like Palo Alto, California? Two dollars. That nice mansion he's building? A more reasonable $63 to him.

You might spend $50 on tickets, food and parking to take your date to see an NHL hockey game. Bill, on the other hand could buy the team for 50 dollars.

You might buy a plane ticket on a Boeing 747 for $1200 at full-fare coach. Mr. Gates could buy six 747s!

Bill could buy every single major league team in Baseball, Football, Basketball and Hockey for only about 35% of his net worth -- plenty left over to buy a European sport. Of course then he wouldn't have around $150 for every person in the USA as he does now. Nor could he still give $6.70 to every person on the planet. Bill could pay Michael Jordan's 1997 salary only 1300 times, but that he could buy 902 million subscriptions to TV guide. He's also fascinated by how much all this money would be if put into dollar bills. Laid end to end, the Bills would stretch 3.8 million miles -- to the moon and back over 8 times. They could paper over all of Manhattan 7 times, or be stacked 2,690 miles high -- watch out for satellites. They would weigh 40,000 tons -- 100 times the weight of one of those 747s he bought above.

BUT, one thing Bill can't do is even dent the national debt. Should he selflessly donate his stock to the U.S. treasury, he would reduce the $5.37 trillion national debt by well under 1%. It's nice to put things in perspective.

If I were Bill Gates, I would have earned thousands of dollars after writing this article. But then again, if I were Bill Gates, I wouldn't waste my time writing this article! By the way, Bill Gates was arrested for running a red light and driving without a license in New Mexico in 1977. Two years earlier, he got tickets for speeding and driving without a license. Hehe, had to throw that in!

Acting

I've had my share of acting experience, during plays when I was in high school and way back when I was in nursery. I couldn't really recall my nursery gig so I'll just narrate it the way my dad tells the story... Christmas was fast approaching and we were to reenact the Nativity and I was Joseph. I was part of the Holy Family! The next day, I was given a different role, I was 1 of the 3 kings. Ok, not bad, at least I was still playing a character with a distinct name and role. The next day, I was given a different role, I was a shepherd. Hmmm... I wasn't really sure why I was going down the cast but hey, a role is a role. And I was so young, I didn't mind. The next day, I was given my last role transfer - I PLAYED A SHEEP! How in the world could you go from Joseph, to a Magi, to a shepherd and finally, TO A SHEEP?! Only I can do that! And hey, I was the best sheep in acting history!

I love watching movies and I've seen films from different genres. I'm amazed to see actors who can shift from one role to another, most especially if the films are of different types. And they do it effectively, they portray the role so well! The following are descriptions of different film genres:

Action

Action films are usually include high energy, big-budget physical stunts and chases, possibly with rescues, battles, fights, escapes, destructive crises (floods, explosions, natural disasters, fires, etc.), non-stop motion, spectacular rhythm and pacing, and adventurous, often two-dimensional "good-guy" heroes battling "bad guys" - all designed for pure audience escapism.

Adventure

Adventure films are usually exciting stories, with new experiences or exotic locales, very similar to or often paired with the action film genre. They can include traditional swashbucklers, serialized films, and historical spectacles, searches or expeditions for lost continents, "jungle" and "desert" epics, treasure hunts, disaster films, or searches for the unknown.

Comedy

Comedies are light-hearted plots consistently and deliberately designed to amuse and provoke laughter (with one-liners, jokes, etc.) by exaggerating the situation, the language, action, relationships and characters. This section describes various forms of comedy through cinematic history, including slapstick, screwball, spoofs and parodies, romantic comedies, black comedy (dark satirical comedy), and more.

Crime and Gangster

Crime (gangster) films are developed around the sinister actions of criminals or mobsters, particularly bank robbers, underworld figures, or ruthless hoodlums who operate outside the law, stealing and murdering their way through life. Criminal and gangster films are often categorized as film noir or detective-mystery films - because of underlying similarities between these cinematic forms. This category includes a description of various 'serial killer' films.

Drama

Dramas are serious, plot-driven presentations, portraying realistic characters, settings, life situations, and stories involving intense character development and interaction. Usually, they are not focused on special effects, comedy or action. Dramatic films are probably the largest film genre, with many subsets.

Epic or Historical

Epics include costume dramas, historical dramas, war films, medieval romps, or 'period pictures' that often cover a large expanse of time set against a vast, panoramic backdrop. Epics often share elements of the elaborate adventure films genre. Epics take an historical or imagined event, mythic, legendary, or heroic figure, and add an extravagant setting and lavish costumes, accompanied by grandeur and spectacle, dramatic scope, high production values, and a sweeping musical score. Epics are often a more spectacular, lavish version of a biopic film. Some 'sword and sandal' films (Biblical epics or films occuring during antiquity) qualify as a sub-genre.

Horror

Horror films are designed to frighten and to invoke our hidden worst fears, often in a terrifying, shocking finale, while captivating and entertaining us at the same time in a cathartic experience. Horror films feature a wide range of styles, from the earliest silent Nosferatu classic, to today's CGI monsters and deranged humans. They are often combined with science fiction when the menace or monster is related to a corruption of technology, or when Earth is threatened by aliens. The fantasy and supernatural film genres are not usually synonymous with the horror genre. There are many sub-genres of horror: slasher, teen terror, serial killers, satanic, Dracula, Frankenstein, etc.

Musical

Musical/dance films are cinematic forms that emphasize full-scale scores or song and dance routines in a significant way (usually with a musical or dance performance integrated as part of the film narrative), or they are films that are centered on combinations of music, dance, song or choreography. Major subgenres include the musical comedy or the concert film.

Science Fiction

Sci-fi films are often quasi-scientific, visionary and imaginative - complete with heroes, aliens, distant planets, impossible quests, improbable settings, fantastic places, great dark and shadowy villains, futuristic technology, unknown and unknowable forces, and extraordinary monsters (“things or creatures from space”), either created by mad scientists or by nuclear havoc. They are sometimes an offshoot of fantasy films, or they share some similarities with action/adventure films. Science fiction often expresses the potential of technology to destroy humankind and easily overlaps with horror films, particularly when technology or alien life forms become malevolent.

Based on the descriptions as well as the films I've seen, the most difficult genre to act in would have to be comedy. For action, you just need lots of dynamics, stunts, explosions and the like together with the good versus evil story. For adventure, you just need an idea of exploration, which is not the job of the actor. For crime and gangster, you just need mobsters and lots of criminal activity, just act slick. For drama, the actor should just cry or show the difficulties the character they play endures. For epic, just act out what the legend or historical fact states. For horror, you need to act scared or act as killers or monsters. For musical, just sing and dance. And for sci-fi, act out being an alien or some strange act of nature. In comedy, you need to have proper timing and delivery. If the actor can't deliver well, it wouldn't be effective. And, it's really difficult to make people laugh!

Acting is a great art. I admire actors most especially those who are in theater. I really hate those actors who are all look and no talent but they get paid a lot! They are a big disgrace to this art and they give a big slap on the faces of the people who are the pioneers of this industry. I'd like to spread super glue on their faces, place a leather mat, let it dry and then pull the mat off with one quick motion! And do again and again and again!

Blast from the Past

Different cartoon characters will be following the huge and successful footsteps of summer blockbuster Transformers. I found this very interesting since I was a fan, at some point in time, of these cartoon classics about to make their big screen debuts.

Lorenzo di Bonaventura, co-producer of Transformers, said a script for all-American war hero G.I. Joe was being written and Paramount have earmarked November 2008 for the release of the first full-length animated Smurfs movie. Meanwhile, Warner Brothers are planning to produce movie adaptations of He-Man and Thundercats while Fox is working on a script for Alvin and the Chipmunks.

I truly hope they deliver, just like what the sparkplug of this trend (the Transformers) did. It truly was a great experience seeing Optimus Prime in action with a realistic look. If the Autobots and Deceptacons in the movie looked like the ones in the cartoons, I would be laughing my head off. They did a great job turning these characters to something real as they were able to preserve the look that they had in the cartoon series. It had comedy, drama and of course, action! Just one thing..... Isn't Megatron a gun, not a jet? It's very hard to find movies that would get your attention with every scene, but the Transformers got me hooked from start to finish.

Looking forward to the "Blast from the Past" movies!